What I have learned since I returned to Canada is that much like an immigrant moving to a new country, and much like I felt going to Malaysia, I did't fit. I am not sure why this happened. I just know that it did. Three years away from what I knew left me looking from the outside in. I knew it all, but I was no longer a part of it all. I had to learn how to be here. Maybe it was because I had no home. That sounds dramatic, because my daughter wanted me to live in their home. They had a room for me with privacy, but in that room I had luggage full of tropical clothing. All else was in storage on the island. I arrived in near winter. I was frozen. Not wanting to buy more winter clothing, I would traipse down to Fraser street and buy the odd fleece or sweater to wear over and over until I got back to my things on the island. Now what? I had to do another semester of my master degree, so settled into writing the papers and completing the assignments. It was wonderful reacquainting myself with the grandchildren. But exhausting too. In Malaysia I loved all the little children, but I could go home after a day with them. Here, it was 24/7. Then my wonderful son surprised everyone and got married and bought a house on the island. Not intending to live there immediately, they asked me to stay there to keep an eye on the place. Now several months later, tons of construction, and now more construction, I still have not been able to deal with my own stuff. My things are out of storage, but still boxed up with nowhere to go. I am so fortunate to have children who want me. Many others do not have the same.
This labour day weekend was fantastic. After a $ store trip gathering all sorts of trinkets and toys for the kids we had scavenger hunts, a trip to the Victoria petting zoo, movies, and $store shopping for the kids. We played games, we drew pictures, we ate birthday cake. Seeing this island paradise through the eyes of children is a gift one appreciates. Although the trip is just across the Straits, I appreciate all the time and stress it takes to make it happen. Thank you Jennifer for making it happen.
Now I see that I need to realize I do belong here. I know I can drink the water from the tap. I know that I drive on the right side of the road. I know that we have seasons, and each one of them has its own beauty.
I also know that I better get my butt in gear and finish that thesis. No one is going to do it for me. Right now I will climb up on those bunkbeds and put the clean linen on, ready for the next journey back to see Nana.
But first, a delightful Canadiano from my red espresso that waited those three years for my return.
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