Canadian Content - Post Turtle

Everyone can read this, but only Canucks will understand it. A friend sent this to me. It is accurate.

While suturing a cut on the hand of a 75 year old farmer, the doctor struck up a conversation with the old man.

Eventually the topic got around to politicians and their role as our leaders.

The old rancher said, "Well, you know, most politicians like Mike Duffy are 'Post Turtles'.''

Not being familiar with the term, the doctor asked him, what a 'post turtle' was.

The old rancher said, "When you're driving down a country road and you come across a fence post with a turtle balanced on top, that's a post turtle."

The old rancher saw the puzzled look on the doctor's face so he continued to explain. "You know he didn't get up there by himself, he doesn't belong up there, he doesn't know what to do while he's up there, he's elevated beyond his ability to function, and you just wonder what kind of dumb ass put him up there to begin with."

Best explanation I've heard yet.

Have You Ever Wanted Something But............

I have noticed that when I want something, try to figure out how to get it, do everything I can do get it, and then finally give up, because it seems to want to be out of reach - it comes to me.  That is exactly what happened today. I have been searching around this country for silk '1 Malaysia'  batik.  I thought it would be a good souvenir to take home with me. One of my schools H.M. had Punjabi dresses made for all her teachers in the batik print and it looks fantastic on teacher's day when they all wear them.  Anyway, I finally gave up, and today I was at that Tamil school. The Head Mistress was beaming

when I arrived.  She had a package for me. Not the Punjabi suit; she did not know my size; but enough fabric to make my own.  Now all I have to do is give up on all the other things I keep trying to have or do and they too will come to me in good time.

How To Stay Connected When Apart

I think that I have seen one of the ways that Ry and Sumi manage to get through those long days apart when he goes off to work. I admire how they survive this. It has to be difficult to do. Both of them are clearly independent people. I know how much they mean to each other; so how do they do it?  I am guessing that their relationship with each other is strong. But what I see, as a mother, is the two of them on Skype, but probably doing their work, but somewhat available for each other.  It kind of looks like two people sharing a room.  Those two probably have better communication skills with each other than two people who never leave the other physically from month to month. Why? Because they know the value of physical presence and appreciate that presence when it happens.  I turn on my Skype, and when Ry is away but has an internet connection, I see him and I see Sumi both available.  It makes me happy that they are there, sharing that 'room', just like the rest of the world shares space, but in a cyber way on Skype.  It makes me happy to know that they are there, and will be in the same physical space soon.

Line Up to Suck Every Ringgit You Can Get Out of Us

A quick trip to Singapore for a surprise 4 hour visit with Ry and a dr. appointment with a specialist left me behind for a day at work and a car that was yet again dead as a doornail.  Lucky for me, I had invested in booster cables - this dead car issue is not new.  They never fix it, I tell them constantly.  But today, after a boost, the stranger who boosted me drove off with my cables. That was the last straw. I called the lease company and said pick it up now.  How about tomorrow was the reply. NOPE, now. And they did.  But the bonus was the two that came to get the car (why 2 to take one car back?) were great. They went over my car with a finetooth comb. They could not find RM600 of repairs needed. The amount that the lease company said required repaired.  Jeez I will pay my way; but I truly dislike gouging when people try to do that to me.

The two guys also understood the problem with the car. When I told them the indications, they said - ah, yes this is electrical issue.  Wow, three of us on the same page. It only took three years and a dozen batteries before someone understood.

As for Singapore, I discovered that the pollution we had has done a nasty job on my sinuses that could require surgery to repair. I am thinking that clean air and home might be a better resolution.  And the surprise visit from Ryan for lunch was just what the doctor ordered as far as I am concerned. It actually feels like I dreamt it all. It happened and ended so quickly.  What a great gift - which I will milk for years to come. Each year I will bore people who will listen about how I took a quick trip to Singapore on (or about) my 64th and who I saw there.  We will enjoy it.  As we did for that late lunch. And then he was gone, just as quickly as he arrived.

Now with a loaner chariot, I should be able to make fast tracks to the schools tomorrow and get myself back into the routine.

Heading to the Tax Office

Today is give all my money to Malaysia day.  We have to file our taxes early this year to assure the government they have taken enough moolah from us before we evacuate.  What a nasty day - early morning traffic jam on a Monday heading into the heart of JB.  Alas, I wont have to go there ever again, so I guess I can consider one more 'last thing' to do here.  WIsh me luck with the traffic.  And to top it off - this is how I am spending my birthday this year.

I had a peek at the forms we must submit. I guess every country has this insanity, but since I am here, I will point the finger at the country that is the offender for this instance.

Another Step Closer

I had a meeting today with my landlord(s).  There seems to be a swarm of them - they all inherited the property when their father passed away a while ago.  They are very organized, they discuss with each other and reach consensus before they finalize anything. Very accommodating too. I can stay in the house until the day I leave, even though it is past the rental date. Of course for a fee, but that makes life easier for me. And I can sleep in my bed until the end as well - they will disburse the charity items for me once I am gone.  Another kudo for Malaysia. I have never had a disagreeable encounter with the Chinese that I have done business with.  The bunch has confirmed that statement once again.  I already sent them home with my indoor grill; and watched them pick up the flowerpots stacked outside my garden. It is nice to see there is someone who wants this stuff.  The pile of pots have sat here for almost three weeks with percuma plastered all over them; and still they sit.

A Question for My Children

Will you still need me? Will you still feed me? When I'm 64....

Don't be too quick to answer - the time is soon

64

What is a Canadian?

I am not even sure if anyone over here really cares.  But, being a Canuck, and when asked  where you come from?  constantly is responded with - ok lah, American - kind of gets my back up.  Yes, in the grand scheme of things, I am an American, just like a Mexican is, A Perivian is, a Brazilian is, and all else that live in North, Central, and South Americas.  Somehow those who live in the USA could not figure out what to call themselves as citizens of that country and stole the name American from the rest of us.  The people who ask that question think of me as a USA citizen. I am not.  They probably dont care - the lines blur when you are so far away geographically. As a Canadian, I have the need to be known as a Canadian.I understand how they can be confused. If it were not for the clothing many wear here I would not be sure who is Malay, Chinese, or Indian.  They get to be coded by what they wear, but in Canada we and our neighbours to the south all look the same.

There seems to be a common thread when Canadians are defined. We are seen as peacemakers and activists for peace around the globe. We tend to be known as those who stand up for the underdogs. So, having said that, here is a perfect example of that. My friend has a son who went on his own SE Asia adventure. Like all the rest of us, he found a small pup, injured and unmoving under a parked vehicle. The difference between him and the rest of us is he did something about it - and followed through.  Not many young travellers have a wad of cash for extras.  He is likely in that category. But look who he brought home?  (after leaving him in Thailand to heal, get all paperwork to travel and immigrate to Canada along with a great deal of money and trust that the procedure would unfold after he was gone)

This is Gab, picking up his new buddy at YVR.  I cannot think of a better description of a Canadian than what this picture shows us.

Social Networking and Loneliness

I stumbled across a video that is a good one to watch if you want to know why you are so hooked on FaceBook.  I have never understood the obsession of Facebook; now I know why.  Having said this, the video also made me look at my own blog through critical eyes. I will admit, many of my ramblings here are my way of staying connected.  Initially, this blog was my means to let everyone at home know I was ok, and what I was experiencing. It is still the purpose, however, I know that I have used the blog to figure out many things that puzzle me. If I write it down, it is real. If it is real, I can then begin to understand it. It works.  I think the difference between this blog and the other social network is that I bare my soul because I need some answers for myself. On the other fluttery one, people show off their quests and only put their best foot forward for others to see.  I could be wrong, but on my blog I am not looking for likes, comments about 'how cute' or all else. I am just sharing my life with family and friends, and whoever wants to know what life is like here.  I have no need for approval.

But back to FaceBook. The other day a colleague was bemoaning about how exhausted and ill she felt. She never lets herself be alone. Always on the go, lunch with someone, dinner with others, and online until the wee hours of the morning. When does she have time to just be?  Never.  All my new friends and acquaintances are FaceBook addicts.  They are online continually, thanks to their new fancy schmancy smart phones.  It is the same where I come from. People beat their chests with pride announcing how many friends they have on FaceBook.  But do they even know themselves?  No, not without the support of however many friends they have on their 'page'.  Take a look at this video and you will see what I have been espousing for a number of years.  I admit I am an introvert.  But what are people addicted to social networking (texting and Facebook) doing to themselves. They are making themselves crazy thinking they are communicating but very much alone.  And trust me, their communication skills are diabolical because of this new language they have built due to need for speed.

What is social networking creating?

Curry Leaf Chicken

My outstanding neighbour - not the vegetarian one, but another Chinese friend called me frantically today. She called about 5 times, and finally I was able to take her call.  She asked me to stop by before I go home. I did.  She presented me with some fried chicken that her mother in law made.  No one there cooks often, and frankly, I was drooling at Hari Raya time because mother in law makes curry leaf chicken once a year, at that time.  I did not get any.  Today we chatted and turns out that Cynthia told her mother in law I do not like curry. WHAT?  Actually she was sort of right. She and I went to a Malay wedding together recently, and they served curry. But their curry is enough to start a fire.  The curry leaf chicken is just a seductive mingle of curry leaf and other spices that makes you believe you will never get enough of the stuff. Turns out mother in law was making some today. I got a bagful of curry leaf chicken today.  Now, after texting her and thanking again, she called.  Seems I cannot get the recipe. She goes to some Indian downtown who grinds the spices for her, then she adds the curry leaf. But Cynthia is going to look up the names of herbs so I can do the same in Canada.  Sure I can.

For now, I shall dine very nicely, on Indian secret recipe and Chinese addition of curry leaf. Yum!

36 or 37

OK, I am proving my point. A scholar in math I am not. I leave HERE in about 30 days. I leave the country in 36 or 37.  Either case, as far as I am concerned, I have to have this place in order on a month.  Still being lead around like a dog on a short leash regarding the company. They change the rules daily, they make up new rules, and they generally either dont know what they are doing or dont want us to know what they are doing. Now the passport issue which freaks me out. First, no one would take the passports, we had control. Second, someone will take the passports and return them via one or two other people within about a week. Third, all the same as second, but 'unsure when they will be returned'.  Yes, in a land where everything goes missing easily and a document being passed between several pairs of hands before it returns to the owner, I am freaked!  Plus I am still ill, and may have to go to Singapore for medical treatment - and for that I NEED MY PASSPORT!

O Canada

the place where I can anticipate outcomes (usually)

As I shut down life here..........

Meals will become far more creative than ever before. I have given away a bunch of packaged things that I bought and never used. I am now foraging through the fridge to consume what is left, and hopefully have little need to buy much fresh any longer.  By the end, I suppose it could look like this.

Except, at that time I would likely be sitting on a lawn chair

Gordon is Upset

I have some batik art that I am taking home. One piece has been on my living room wall for a few years, taped in place, and surrounded by photos of family.  I have been contemplating taking it down and getting it properly framed and then mailed home.  I keep stalling because Gordon's nightly ritual involves the batik. Every night at 5:45 he emerges from behind the television. He could turn right and go directly outside to the playground on my patio roof; but he always takes a left turn, hikes up the wall, and then slips in behind this batik.  I have seriously considered leaving it on the wall for fear of seeing something disgusting behind as I wonder what the heck he does there.  I have had a plan for a few weeks. Plan an outing, have my patio door ready for fast exit, take a floor mop, nudge the taped batik off the wall, and then run to the escape route, allowing whatever will transpire after I have dislodged whatever from the wall. I just have not done the task because I have been too ill to go out for more than a doctor appointment.  I do not want to see what falls off the wall after 3 years of daily ritual.  I did it yesterday before I went to work. I knew I had a long day at work, so it was a perfect day to be out of the house for an extended time.  All went well. The mop eventually knocked it down to the floor, where I had cleared a space for it to land.  The door was open, my chariot was ready for me.  NOTHING. There was nothing behind the batik.  Poor little Gordon. He has been traumatized.  Last night when I came home, I turned on the patio light because it was nearing gecko frolic time.  No sign of Gordon.  I did not see him emerge from behind the television either.  Whatever he was doing behind that batik, he can do no more.  I feel terrible.  Maybe he is suffering from PTSS.  I guess I could find some ativan and leave it out for him.

My Math is Really Bad

I just looked at a calendar. I leave here in 38 days.  What made me think it was in the 50's?

Back to Work and Back on the Hwys

It was a pleasant couple of weeks to not be on the crazy highways, and surprisingly, not a nightmare when I got back on them yesterday.  I have to laugh at the way they repair potholes here.  The two, combined, that were the size of the Atlantic Ocean have been repaired again. What a joy.  The usual drop off of a pile of asphalt was replaced with a load of concrete!  Who knows how this is going to weather the climate here. But it can't be worse than washed out asphalt they have been using. I recall an offramp to the shopping centre when I first arrived. It was like driving through Serengeti forging your own trail.  Some genius had repaired the road with concrete and then allowed everyone to drive on it before it set. It was ruts, lumps, and caverns of concrete shards that could slash your tires. Now, three years later, it has all eroded, and you just drive on the somewhat flattened surface that is left.  I am not sure how a highway will fare with concrete. But I dont care. I will hopefully be long gone from here when it becomes an issue to avoid.

As for the exit from the country, I think it could be a smoother sailing if this company I work for knew what they were doing. The tasks change hour by hour, the doers of the tasks change as often. Most recently we now must trust some local with our passports for a week. OMG - not something I care to allow. It was fine a week ago - we were going to go to immigration ourselves and get the visas cancelled. Now some goof wants to be the big guy who takes all passports and does it himself. EEEK, I dont like that one. But there are laughs. One new colleague asked when she was going to get her tax refund from last year. I had to catch my breath from laughing before I told her that we had to wait for 9 months for that refund, and that was only because we signed authority for the company to negotiate this on our behalf.  In this country there are no refunds. If you try to get them you are wasting your energy. Some never did get their refund, and another got a cheque in the mail that was stale dated, and had to start all over again. Then there is the issue of the rental deposits. Most of the landlords are living month to month. So, does one really believe that the RM3000 cash we handed over is still around? And in my case, the guy is dead, so family who took over probably used the money - if he did not already - for his funeral.  Yes, then there are the numerous e-mails all sent through the work server that have no continuity. I have given up. These people are not teachable. Latest message - be sure to take all the paperwork (some name I cannot type properly) expects you to have at the tax office.  I could  not find any message that stated this. I finally admitted defeat and asked the question. Answer? it was in 'one of my e-mails'.  I dug through all his e-mails. Nothing. How do these people function on a daily basis?  Turns out it was in a message with the subject line 'sim cards' - which never spoke of sim cards in the message at all, and then buried in an attached memo to all of us that was titled mentors August 8th (sent during vacation).  Yes, I can see how easy it was for me to find.  Silly how I had so much difficulty trying to find the list of paperwork I was to bring to the tax office; when there right in front of me was the line in that buried letter - bring the SWIFT CODE of your foreign bank account. How do these people function on a daily basis? BTW, they are also foreigners - so no excuse for cultural differences. When you read this stupidity, does this come to mind?

Family Matters

I enjoyed my weekend, even if it was one of hard labour. I talked with all my family.  Nothing soothes a soul better than talking to family.  Well, maybe hugs to go with that would make it perfect.  As I wind down my work, the two offsprings keep theirs going on. One traveling for work, and the other travelling soon to get to work. It kind of makes me sad that I will not see Ryan in Malaysia again.  But glad too that he made the effort to always drop in on Ma before or after work.  I am a lucky lady.  He even came to me before going home to Sumi.

I had my regular visit with the grandchildren in the tub.  Mom was telling me that they were both a couple of little thunderclouds that day. It was true. Levi had a frown, and Kolly tried her best to not be the happy little girl she normally is.  Things changed dramatically when I told Levi to not smile. Who cannot smile when they get that statement directed at them? And then the giggles and usual behaviour came back for Nana before we had to say good night.

As I chatted with Ry, we got onto the topic of Gordon.  After finding a crispy Gordon lookalike in the kitchen pantry, and another wee offspring under my bed splayed out on the floor - very dead; he asked if one of them was Gordon. No, Gord still emerges from behind the television every night at 6pm and then traipses out to the patio for his nightly frolic. He still has me trained. If the light does not go on when he gets to his playground, the chatter is more than one can tolerate. I asked Ry  ' who will turn on the light for Gordon when I am gone?'  He suggested I take him home with me.  I have read that geckos live about 4 years.  Not sure how much milage is left on this little guy.  I have been here for 3, and he was not a baby when we first met.

As crappy as internet is here, I have a connection with family.  I am pretty sure I could not have done this stint with only snail mail to get me through the 3 years. I am glad I was here. I have had the best visits with Ry that could never have happened if we both lived in Canada. What good looking young man would go on vacation with his mom unless they both were away from home?  And living away from home gave me the gift of living in my daughter's home.  What person would have their mother move in if both were residents of the same country?  Yes, this journey has had some very good experiences, not just with work, but with family.  I think we have all discovered that we really love each other and can even tolerate an old ladies idiosyncrasies when we know it is only temporary.

For now, I am glad I am indoors. I hear some large critter calling outside in the predawn.  I am guessing it is a monitor lizard. Not someone I choose willingly to have a  face to face encounter.  Yay for doors, even though the little ones walk freely through them at will.

I Did It! or at least I am getting it done.....

I managed to clean, scour, and close off the two extra bedrooms upstairs. I have piled up a heap of linens and clothing for charity, and I have packed one suitcase for travel. What I put in that luggage is stuff I really want back at home. So, the other bag will be a bonus. Whatever fits in there weight wise is what will go with me.  That is a lot of pressure off my mind.

I have often heard that moving is the most stressful thing a person can do. I am in complete agreement with that.  People find a place to live, make a nest, and then want it to stay that way. At least most do.  I am in that category. And I keep doing this nomad thing and keep moving and then starting all over again. I hope I have learned something from this one. Moving within a country is stressful but doable. Moving across the world is a bit more of a test.  Artifacts from this place?  Not much. It will have to be stored in my head along with all the other drivel I accumulate. A couple of souvenirs from Bali but memories are what are going home with me.  Ah, drat. I have the batik art.  I guess they take their chances and go by mail.

The Day Albert Einstein Feared - it has arrived

I have had dinner with people like this. I am sure you have as well.  And think of the times you travel and see couples together doing just this.  Best friends never saying a word, sitting side by side, and texting....

Culturally Appropriate?

I got this from a former student.  I know here intention was humour, so here it is with the same. I also like the fact that she sees the humour. No insensitivity intended.

Truth hits home when we see chefs from Britain. Can you imagine?

Feeling Very Sorry For Myself

Back to the real doctor because I am still ailing. I have two options. One, go to specialist in JB and have my sinuses drained. Two, another course of antibiotics. I chose number two.  I trust his opinion. I almost feel better knowing I am sick because I was beginning to think I was becoming a very accomplished whiner. I almost thought I needed all the teeth pulled on the right side of my face. The sinus pain was so intense. Now sitting at a cafe because the dobi does not have my cleaning done yet and I am not going to go out again just to pick that up. Work starts next week and I am not looking forward to that because of the way I feel. But on the other hand I can dump many things at the schools and thus clear more out of my house.

There you go. I can whine with the best of them.

So Much For Vacation

I did not go anywhere, and I did not feel great. But I did make good progress on downsizing.  I have most of the furniture ready to go to the assigned recipient. A divorced woman with children. I cant think of anyone better than that.  I have tackled the office supplies and decided that they can go to the schools. More bribe gifts for classroom management, dvd's, and appliances now have to find a home.  The post office makes me insane.  One place says go to the other, the other says nothing in English. Everyone seems to think anything has to be wrapped, but there does not seem to be any form of wrapping stuff for sale in this bloody country.  One can buy a sheet of paper about 4' by 2', but that is not going to wrap a suitcase that needs to travel by mail.  I think I will leave that one for another day. It takes too much energy to deal with such dysfunction.  I went for a hair wash. That was good. Maybe I should stash my hairdresser in the suitcase and bring her home.  Yes, I bought another carton of kleenex.  That will hopefully suffice until this dreaded sinus issue is done.

When It's OK to Swear

- 54 -

and can't happen soon enough

Still whining and snivelling. Now seem to have a sinus infection. But did get to the pos laju to mail a parcel to Jenn.  A blouse for her and my certifications and degrees.  It only took about an hour, so I guess things are speeding up.  They would not send it registered because some new law only allows 1 kg to be registered. This was 1.5 kg.  You know, these poor babies cannot lift anything heavier than a fistful nasi lemak, so I understand.  However, their website indicates up to 2 kg, so I disputed.  They finally caved, or maybe just took my money and tossed the package in the trash. Who knows, but I do have a tracking number.  Then they sent me to the express pos because I foolishly asked about sending other bigger parcels.  That bunch had earlier told me they do not send international, but this current bunch said they do. I did not get far there. Everyone there jabbered in Malay, and no English. Finally a nice Chinese girl came in and she translated for me. I think I can do it. I will load up a package and go back when I have the strength to wait around for an English speaking customer who can help me through the process.  

To balance the complaints, I was fortunate to spend 2 hours on hold in order to get the swift code for my bank in Canada.  It is nice to know that everywhere in the world you can expect no service from all industries.  Something that did amuse me was every time I called my bank on the international number when out of country, I was connected to california emergency helicopter services. We were both getting tired of talking to each other after the 4th call to them, and then magically, it went to the right people when I quickly switched the country code back before it dashed over to usa (on its own)for the 5th time.

Check Your Phone Settings Before You Click

Like everything they do in the USA, another sensationalism; this time about cell phone pictures. However, I think I will take heed on this one. There is no need to have a GPS map of where the picture was taken - so  why offer it to those who want it and should not have it?

It is easy to turn off GPS tracking in your smart phone. You can turn it completely off, which means that maps will be of no use; but you can also turn off specific areas of your phone - such as camera.  Watch this video and then decide.

disable GPS in your cell phone camera

Queen Charlotte Islands BC

Not far from where I live, some happy fishermen pulled in some fine salmon yesterday.  Up around the Queen Charlottes, Langara Island to be specific. Here is what the day looked like. Complete with a killer whale watching his dinner be caught by people, and eagles waiting for the leftovers.

Killer whales are always around You are likely going to see a whale waiting around to see if he can get some dinner too.

So Much For Horoscopes

As I dig my way through the rubble I have created, I found the newspaper I bought yesterday. Not wanting it to go to waste, I began reading. The horoscope. That could give me an inspiration amid this chaos.  I think I have learned that following the belief system of horoscopes has to be crossed off any list I might have had.  Here is what I read:

You are apt to take a look at your neat and orderly closet, your well-organized desk and your clean bathroom, and be proud. Other people may fret and be angry at suddenly having to get their life in order, but you are already there. Perhaps you don't realize it because you are such a perfectionist and are constantly striving for more. Perhaps you don't give yourself enough credit for all the work that you do. Be sure to give yourself a solid pat on the back today.

Sure, my closet is neat and tidy because I dont have a closet. My bathroom is clean simply because of default. When you shower there, you clean the bathroom at the same time, And as for my desk, I emptied it completely in anticipation of someone coming to take it to its new home.

Other than that, my home is complete chaos.